These things left unsaid

Flicker through my head

Like the harsh neon glare

Of the lamp above me

From 12.am to 12.pm.

Wish I could tell you

How ugly I am

Even as I pretend

And lie to myself

That I am pretty in your eyes.

*

I never know how to start

To tell you how I’m falling apart

That my heart needs mending

And my soul yearns for healing

But these hollow empty words

Really mean nothing.

*

Maybe I should have

Loved someone else instead

Even if I didn’t

Want to lose you and

He loved you more than I did.

(I think I might have made you up in my head)

How do I explain

That I’m not breathing

Just exchanging gases

With my surroundings

While pleading for a single kiss

(I miss you so and my blood is running low)

*

I never know how to start

To tell you how I’m falling apart

That my heart needs mending

And my soul yearns for healing

But these hollow empty words

Really mean nothing.

*

I want to hold your face,

You who stole that

Place in my core

Before I leave in the

Windowless one-way transport home

Just to tell you

How beautiful you were

When you smiled through that

Polished door and tore

My resolve forever more.

*

I never know how to start

To tell you how I’m falling apart

That my heart needs mending

And my soul yearns for healing

But these hollow empty words

Really mean nothing